the odd fellow who took my senior portrait looked like jake gyllenhaal with a bad haircut. he tried to make me pose in odd and unnatural positions, and i rejected the offer of holding a red rose in my teeth. he never seemed to understand why i laughed so hard when he howled "c'mon, lemme put it in yer mouth!"

this morning i woke up with an itch on my leg and a message scrawled across my forehead in marker. it was hard to concentrate on my SAT's with "stupid cooter" burning a hole in the front of my hand-knitted hat. i don't think the woman screaming "help" or the constant blowing of a not-so-distant train helped either

so this afternoon i returned home with a huge weight lifted off of my shoulders, no more bad photographs, no more evil standardized tests (for a while), and i told my dad a knock-knock joke to which he responded "that was horrible" and walked away leaving me feeling just a tiddle triumphant. he never did get my jokes

i learned many things in the past couple of days. pita bread smells like potting soil when it gets moldy. a dog can get hit by a truck, spin around in the road and still run away wagging his tail. it is nice when my mom sends me new yorker articles and cartoons in the mail. not all hitchhikers smell bad. it is not wise to eat ravioli from maria's bazaar. fin

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